The dry-fruits box ritual

I wrote this on Medium sometime last year. But something in me stirred and I wanted to share it again. That is the thing with memories – they are so random. Randomly beautiful. Beautifully random.

For some reason today, I am again reminded of the little ritual of filling the boxes with dry fruits. Every month, Pa used to bring home 200 grams of anjeer, raisins, cashews, almonds, dates and pistachios from a local store at the fresh market. He’d announce his arrival with a “Tan-ta-daaa, look what I have got!” and we always knew. We always knew that this meant only one thing — filling up the boxes with dry fruits. After getting refreshed, we would all go to the kitchen, get the almost empty boxes of dry fruits and then carefully set them on the dining table. We’d huddle together around Pa. Meticulously he’d open the packet of anjeer, they always went in first, those rings stacked around a fibrous cord. This was followed by the raisins and every time he would take extra care while opening the packet of raisins always tsk-ing away at why they staple these packets and how one has to be very careful lest the pins get mixed with the raisins. And we’d chorus, “We will eat them one by one and not stuff them in our mouth at once,” because that was what we were always told and we knew when we had to give him that reassurance. It was a joy watching him struggle with pins because he had such short nails that it was impossible to say if he had ever had them any other way. Finally, he’d manage to get the pin out (always stubborn to use his fingers). The dates, almonds and cashews followed. What always excited us were the pistachios. Somehow they were the most enticing of nuts, the one that gaped through the gaps waiting for the shell to be broken. The pistachios were always eaten 6 at a time. We did not want to finish them soon. It did not really matter a lot if we did, but somehow that was how we wanted to pace ourselves always. Once the boxes were all filled, we helped Pa carry them to the kitchen and place them on the rack — the second row from the top, just about the right height for us to reach for it if I tip-toed or stood on one of the chairs at the dining table.

For some reason, I thought of this and it made me smile and also sad at the same time. I miss the predictability that still always had an element of undiluted happiness year after year. I visualize Pa’s smile as he filled each jar with a small announcement and it was and is easily one of the happiest moments we have had together.

Grand 2019

Let’s face it – everyone seems really kicked about 2019. At least that is the impression I get from all the inspiration and happiness that seems to emanate from social media. And I mean this in a very very positive upbeat way – I love New Year. Who am I kidding – I love all the New Years and we have a fair share of them as Indians. So yes, I love festivity, new beginnings, the fervour that accompanies these beginnings and how it seems to make everyone look forward to a brighter time. I am a sucker of sweetness and mush.

With that out of the way and acknowledging that some why‘s can never be answered, let me tell you what I am most excited about 2019. I am excited because I want to make it grand. I want it to be fabulous and I will go out of my way to make that happen. Infact, we already made a beginning – because, as I sit here writing this, I see the most fiercely loving pair of eyes look at me beseechingly to get her off the sofa and onto my lap. While I have spent my fair share of nights we have spent our fair share of nights wondering if and why we deserve this unconditional love, I am not going to that territory again. I rather focus my energy on giving all of my love, even if it means falling short of what we are receiving, Because let us be honest, we are basking in the love and glory that Mili has brought with her and showers us with so generously. I cannot believe I denied myself of this happiness for this long and K had to talk me into just taking the plunge.

And that exactly, that is my plan for making it grand – taking the plunge. Not over-thinking it. Not do a pros-cons analysis. Because that is how it works – you make a decision and then everything works around it. Of course, this shifts things, moves your other ‘plans’ and all that, but it will still come together beautifully inspite of some challenges along the way.

So yes, that is my plan for 2019 – to make it grand. And that, sweet reader, is my wish for you.